We’re used to being very down on so-called ‘needy’ people. But perhaps – in many situations – the problem doesn’t lie so much with the apparently ‘needy’ party, but with the person describing their lover as such.

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FURTHER READING

“The ‘needy’ person is a stock figure of caricature: they call too much, they cry when you leave to get a glass of water, they feel put out when you check your phone, they were upset when you watched a film without them. We hate needy people a lot. But let’s look at this another way. There are, of course, a few pathologically dependent people at large, but a lot of the time, far more than is generally accepted, the person who has the problem isn’t the ‘needy’ person at all, it is us; the ones who are doing the accusing…”

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