Your closest-relationship patterns were set before you had words for them, and they keep repeating. Marc Cameron on attachment styles and how the core pattern can change.
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⏱ EPISODE CHAPTERS (confirmed against edited cut, 31:22 runtime)
00:00 The question underneath how we love
02:04 Meet Marc, How We Love, and the free quiz
04:04 Why most of how we relate is subconscious
05:12 Two tornadoes: Marc's own marriage
09:30 Stuck on repeat, and why awareness comes first
11:00 Attachment as relationship programming
12:05 The Avoider
16:44 The Pleaser and the Vacillator
19:27 The Controller and the Victim
20:15 Earned secure attachment and the core pattern
22:20 The comfort circle, the healing tool
27:46 Reaction versus response, and your coherent narrative
29:40 Where to start, the individual work
WHAT YOU'LL TAKE AWAY
The five attachment styles (Avoider, Pleaser, Vacillator, Controller, Victim), and how to spot your own
Why two styles form a predictable core pattern, the pursue-and-withdraw cycle so many couples get stuck in
Earned secure attachment, the research that says the patterns you learned in childhood are not fixed
The comfort circle, a listener-and-speaker practice that turns conflict into repair
Why practice, not insight alone, rewires how you relate, because whatever you practice, you get good at
ABOUT MARC CAMERON
Marc Cameron is a licensed marriage and family therapist and co-leader of How We Love, the organization founded by Milan and Kay Yerkovich, whose original book has sold more than 400,000 copies. After the framework changed his own marriage, Marc trained under the Yerkoviches and now leads the work with his wife, Amy. His book "Understanding Your Attachment Style" (2025) walks through the five styles and the practice of earning secure connection. He also co-hosts New Life Live and sees couples in his Southern California practice.
https://www.howwelove.com
https://www.youtube.com/@HowWeLove
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PRODUCTION CREDITS
Hosted and executive produced by April Chavez. https://www.linkedin.com/in/aprilmchavez/
Video production by Manlee J. Chavez. https://www.linkedin.com/in/manleejchavez/
Music by Steve Stuntz. https://www.youtube.com/@stevestuntz9303
The views expressed by guests on The Wellness Driven Life Show do not always reflect those of April Chavez or The Wellness Driven Life Show. For more details and a disclaimer, visit https://drivenlivin.com/guest-agreements.
#AttachmentStyles #MarcCameron #HowWeLove #SecureAttachment #TWDLS
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